Cynthia Erivo'S Explosive Memoir: Heartbreak, Identity, And Unfiltered Rage

Cynthia Erivo: More Than Just a Star

Cynthia Erivo is a powerhouse – her voice and presence light up any room. But in her new memoir, she reveals a life far from the spotlight, filled with rupture, revelation, and raw emotion. Her story is one of family fractures, identity struggles, and a moment of "blackout rage" that forever changed a key professional relationship.

Facing the Past: Confronting Abandonment

In "Simply More: A Book for Anyone Who’s Been Told They’re Simply Too Much," Erivo dives into an early heartbreak: her father walking out on her at sixteen. "I was 16 when he left me, alone, in a London underground station after an argument about a transit pass," she recalls. The incident severed their relationship entirely.

For years, she tried to prove her worth, seeking his approval. But with time, she reached a hard-won peace. "I have come to understand he was never meant to be a dad," she writes. This openness about her pain shows how far she's come – folding it into her story with honesty.

Navigating Family and Identity

Though close with her mother and sister, Erivo faced challenges when embracing her queerness. "My queerness goes against the grain of what many people think is right and proper," she writes. As a teen, an unreturned crush sent her back into the closet.

Cautious around her family, she eventually confided in friends during drama school. "I think my mother is worried about what others think," she shares. Her sister's acceptance has been slower, but there's been a recent shift. Publicly, Erivo came out as bisexual in a 2022 British Vogue interview, highlighting the ongoing pressure on LGBTQ+ individuals.

“[LGBTQ+ people] still feel the need to be constantly justifying why we deserve to be treated as equal beings, when really the only difference is that we love differently and we express ourselves differently.”

Embracing Her True Self

Before fully owning her identity, Erivo had to peel back layers of fear and conditioning. "I don’t think I dated a woman until my late twenties," she admits. It was a journey of self-discovery, marked by inner conflict but ultimately leading to self-acceptance.

Now, in a relationship with actress Lena Waithe, Erivo reflects on the courage it took to navigate family and societal expectations. Despite joy and stability, reaching this point required bravery.

The Blackout Rage That Changed Everything

Erivo's memoir isn't just about emotional journeys. One of the most startling revelations is an explosive anger moment during a rehearsal at the Greek Theater in LA. Her then-manager brought friends to watch, breaching trust and sending her into a "blackout rage."

"I was furious, I don’t think I’ve ever had an outburst like that before or since," she recalls. Friends intervened, and the manager resigned via email, criticizing her behavior. Erivo doesn't shy away from this incident, offering it as proof of the pain she carries – unpredictable and intense.